If you were planning on seeing this movie in the theater, save your money and rent it instead.
I wasn't expecting it to be as creepy as it was. I was under the impression that it would take a more scientific/historical tack, with Nicholas Cage's character uncovering clues about what would happen in the future. It turns out, however, that the codes Cage finds have been whispered to children by aliens (with all the whispering driving them crazy, of course), and signal the dates and locations of disasters around the world, with the last disaster predicted being the end of the world. In this case, the end of the world is caused by massive solar flares that destroy the face of the planet. This is a fate for mankind that I hadn't previously seen in a movie, but being the fan of apocalyptic situations that I am, I enjoyed it.
I did not enjoy the Christian references in the movie. The aliens save some people in order to give mankind a chance to start all over, but only "those who listened" are saved. In the final scene of the movie, Cage's son and another girl are shown running through a field toward a glowing tree, with a large moon in the background. This is presumably the new planet where mankind will rebuild. The tree and situation, in general, were reminiscent of the Garden of Eden or the tree of life. The scene was really cool, but I don't like feeling like I'm being preached to, no matter what the subject is.
Knowing: C+
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Sunday, March 29, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
True North Pistachio Crisps: RECOMMENDED
When I was in grad school, I heard a statistic once regarding new product launches. A ridiculous percentage of new products (something like 80-90%) fail and are removed from the marketplace within a year of launch. That being the case, it's easy to try new products and criticize them. It's much less frequent that I try something new and am genuinely impressed. That leads me to today's review.
The same day that I purchased the repulsive Progresso soup I reviewed in my previous post, I also decided to get a new snack for the little lady to enjoy. I had never heard of True North before, but was intrigued by the fact that the main flavor in this snack was pistachio. I don't think I'd ever heard of a cracker or chip based on nuts prior to that, so I decided to give them a whirl.
I had started my diet by that time, and said pistachio crisps should have been off-limits. After the little lady raved about them, however, I decided to put weight loss on hold and indulge myself. Unfortunately, this snack had an effect similar to Pringles: I couldn't eat just one. Until the bag was gone, I'd sneak a few here and there every time I saw the bag. They were crispy; they were salty, but not in an obnoxious way; they never left me feeling gross like most snacks do. I was obsessed.
I was surprised to learn that True North is a Frito-Lay brand. The same purveyors of fattening, addictive chips and snacks like Cool Ranch Doritos and Peppercorn Ranch Sun Chips (more on those later) have blessed us with a righteous bounty of natural, tasty snacks kissed by crystals of sea salt and a touch of love.
When times are tough, when the sky is dark, when all hope is lost, roll your old bones on over to Super Target and pick yourself up a bag of these hallowed crisps. You'll be glad you did. Your tastebuds need not be bored senseless any longer.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Progresso Reduced Sodium Chicken Noodle Soup: Epic Fail
The day that President Obama was inaugurated was a day of sickness in our home. The little lady was deathly ill, and the planets aligned such that I was able to stay home from work and take her to the doctor. On the way home, we stopped at Target to pick up her prescriptions and some food. One of the items I picked up was Progresso's reduced sodium chicken noodle soup.
The next time she went to work, she took a can of this soup for her lunch. She later complained that she felt like throwing up after she ate it. She has a lot of (what I consider to be) strange food hang-ups, so I attributed this negative reaction to her weirdness and illness. She refused to eat any more of said soup, so the remaining cans sat on the pantry shelf, gathering dust.
Fast forward to today. I was in the mood for something different, so I pulled out some of this soup and heated up a bowl for dinner. I was shocked at how bland it was when I took my first bite. I might as well have been eating water with some rubbery chicken and mushy carrots and noodles added for color. I ran back to the kitchen and grabbed my trusty sea salt grinder, and began to grind...and grind...and grind...and grind. After a few twists, I'd taste the soup again. Nothing. More twists...nothing...more twists...Finally, after about four rounds of twisting, I had something that was sort of worth eating. I suppose I could have just ground a pile of salt onto a plate and eaten that. The nutritional value would have been about the same, and it wouldn't have been nearly as filling.
Reduced sodium soup (especially chicken noodle) makes about as much sense as soup without water. It's bland, boring and has no business being served to humans...at least, not the kind that have tongues. The idea of canned soup is gross enough without removing one of its key ingredients.
So, the next time you're in the mood for a hearty crock of disappointment, treat yourself to a can of Progresso's reduced sodium fare. Yes, I'm extending the F- failing grade to the entire product line. Bon appetit.
The next time she went to work, she took a can of this soup for her lunch. She later complained that she felt like throwing up after she ate it. She has a lot of (what I consider to be) strange food hang-ups, so I attributed this negative reaction to her weirdness and illness. She refused to eat any more of said soup, so the remaining cans sat on the pantry shelf, gathering dust.
Fast forward to today. I was in the mood for something different, so I pulled out some of this soup and heated up a bowl for dinner. I was shocked at how bland it was when I took my first bite. I might as well have been eating water with some rubbery chicken and mushy carrots and noodles added for color. I ran back to the kitchen and grabbed my trusty sea salt grinder, and began to grind...and grind...and grind...and grind. After a few twists, I'd taste the soup again. Nothing. More twists...nothing...more twists...Finally, after about four rounds of twisting, I had something that was sort of worth eating. I suppose I could have just ground a pile of salt onto a plate and eaten that. The nutritional value would have been about the same, and it wouldn't have been nearly as filling.
Reduced sodium soup (especially chicken noodle) makes about as much sense as soup without water. It's bland, boring and has no business being served to humans...at least, not the kind that have tongues. The idea of canned soup is gross enough without removing one of its key ingredients.
So, the next time you're in the mood for a hearty crock of disappointment, treat yourself to a can of Progresso's reduced sodium fare. Yes, I'm extending the F- failing grade to the entire product line. Bon appetit.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
denim lament
The diet I've been on since January is working. Current clothes are starting to fit better. Old clothes are starting to fit again. I could only do about three pushups at a time when I started, but can now do 15. I sleep better, look better (I think) and feel better. These are all the intended and hoped for benefits of dieting, and I'm glad that I have them.
This should all be a cause for celebration, but in one way, it's not. You see, my favorite pair of jeans is the pair that I wear when I'm at my heaviest. They're the perfect shade of indigo--not too dark, and not obscenely faded. The pant legs are whiskered in places, and the edges are frayed. They've got a slight bootcut--a feature I once mocked relentlessly, but have come to love. There are no flashy designs on the pockets, nothing on the front or back that would draw attention to them or me. These jeans are not without fault, however. I've never liked the placement of the belt loops, which causes me to be constantly adjusting them at the waist. They're a bit baggy in the rear, but maybe that's just my diet. These jeans have character, and I love them.
I've never found another pair of jeans like them, and believe me, I've tried. Perhaps the problem has been that stylish clothes usually aren't made for the overweight. Whiskers, flares and the like aren't exactly the styles Big & Tall's target demographic crave, after all. In the place I've been in the continuum of obesity, I've had to order every pair of jeans I've owned for this reason. I'll spend a lot of money to find the right pair of jeans, and while I've made many attempts and even kept a pair or two, nothing has come close to this beloved pair of jeans.
I have them on now. I just looked at myself in the mirror, and this blessed garment is starting to look a little ridiculous on me. I have to pull the belt really tight to keep them from falling off, so the cloth bunches up around my waist. I could probably fit a gallon or two of milk in the rear. They touch the floor just a tad too much for my tastes.
Today might be the last time I wear them, at least, until I gain weight again. As much as I'd like to believe that this will be my last diet ever, the more likely scenario is that I'll hop on the roller coaster of weight gain/loss once again in a year or two. If this does happen, it's also possible that my dear jeans will no longer be en vogue. It's happened with all my other diets, after all. What a depressing thought.
This should all be a cause for celebration, but in one way, it's not. You see, my favorite pair of jeans is the pair that I wear when I'm at my heaviest. They're the perfect shade of indigo--not too dark, and not obscenely faded. The pant legs are whiskered in places, and the edges are frayed. They've got a slight bootcut--a feature I once mocked relentlessly, but have come to love. There are no flashy designs on the pockets, nothing on the front or back that would draw attention to them or me. These jeans are not without fault, however. I've never liked the placement of the belt loops, which causes me to be constantly adjusting them at the waist. They're a bit baggy in the rear, but maybe that's just my diet. These jeans have character, and I love them.
I've never found another pair of jeans like them, and believe me, I've tried. Perhaps the problem has been that stylish clothes usually aren't made for the overweight. Whiskers, flares and the like aren't exactly the styles Big & Tall's target demographic crave, after all. In the place I've been in the continuum of obesity, I've had to order every pair of jeans I've owned for this reason. I'll spend a lot of money to find the right pair of jeans, and while I've made many attempts and even kept a pair or two, nothing has come close to this beloved pair of jeans.
I have them on now. I just looked at myself in the mirror, and this blessed garment is starting to look a little ridiculous on me. I have to pull the belt really tight to keep them from falling off, so the cloth bunches up around my waist. I could probably fit a gallon or two of milk in the rear. They touch the floor just a tad too much for my tastes.
Today might be the last time I wear them, at least, until I gain weight again. As much as I'd like to believe that this will be my last diet ever, the more likely scenario is that I'll hop on the roller coaster of weight gain/loss once again in a year or two. If this does happen, it's also possible that my dear jeans will no longer be en vogue. It's happened with all my other diets, after all. What a depressing thought.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
responding to dark times
If you're like me, you're tired of hearing about the economy, tired of hearing about the stock market, tired of hearing about real estate, tired of hearing about layoffs, tired of hearing about Iraq, tired of hearing about what Barack Obama is having for breakfast, and so forth. These are dark, troubling times we live in, and the end of the tunnel doesn't appear to be anywhere in sight.
When the economy started to really tank in late September/early October, I think people were more shocked than anything. In my line of work, sales plummeted almost overnight. We scratched our heads, shrugged our shoulders, and then continued with our normal routines, assuming this was merely a momentary blip that would correct itself in a few weeks. Boy, were we wrong.
I can see economic troubles really starting to affect people. I, like many people, work for a company that has recently laid people off. Personally, I don't think we've seen the last of the layoffs in my company. I still feel safe, but I wonder what will happen to my friends. Members of my family are worried about their companies and their jobs. Some of my friends have been laid off from their jobs or their companies have gone out of business. I worry for them, too. I probably worry less than most people, though. I can tell that people are changing. They're being more cautious, and they seem less happy. If this means a permanent change in the way Americans manage their money, then it's a good thing. It's too bad that it couldn't have happened under more pleasant circumstances, though.
We all respond to this kind of stress differently. I wrote a few months ago about how I decided to turn off political talk radio and switch to Howard Stern and comedy instead. That continues to this day, and I'm still glad I made the switch. I've also cut way back on my news intake and the amount of time I spend reading two of my favorite publications, Fortune and The Wall Street Journal. There's only so much doom and gloom a person can take, and I got my fill a couple months ago. I've also been looking for lighter music. Right now, I can't get enough Jack Johnson. Anything he's recorded, anything on which he's appeared--I must have it all. I think the little lady thinks I've gone insane with this Jack Johnson kick, but I can't help it. It's laid back, generally positive, and it reminds me of being on vacation or on the beach. I can't think of a better distraction.
Shopping has also become a distraction. Shopping for clothes (dieting has made this a little more palatable), shopping for electronics, shopping for vacations, shopping for whatever. Feeling empty? Economy got you down? My advice to you is to buy more stuff. You'll be helping the economy and keeping soulless corporate stooges like me gainfully employed.
How are you responding to the stress and worries of our times? Any tips or strategies for coping? If so, please do share.
When the economy started to really tank in late September/early October, I think people were more shocked than anything. In my line of work, sales plummeted almost overnight. We scratched our heads, shrugged our shoulders, and then continued with our normal routines, assuming this was merely a momentary blip that would correct itself in a few weeks. Boy, were we wrong.
I can see economic troubles really starting to affect people. I, like many people, work for a company that has recently laid people off. Personally, I don't think we've seen the last of the layoffs in my company. I still feel safe, but I wonder what will happen to my friends. Members of my family are worried about their companies and their jobs. Some of my friends have been laid off from their jobs or their companies have gone out of business. I worry for them, too. I probably worry less than most people, though. I can tell that people are changing. They're being more cautious, and they seem less happy. If this means a permanent change in the way Americans manage their money, then it's a good thing. It's too bad that it couldn't have happened under more pleasant circumstances, though.
We all respond to this kind of stress differently. I wrote a few months ago about how I decided to turn off political talk radio and switch to Howard Stern and comedy instead. That continues to this day, and I'm still glad I made the switch. I've also cut way back on my news intake and the amount of time I spend reading two of my favorite publications, Fortune and The Wall Street Journal. There's only so much doom and gloom a person can take, and I got my fill a couple months ago. I've also been looking for lighter music. Right now, I can't get enough Jack Johnson. Anything he's recorded, anything on which he's appeared--I must have it all. I think the little lady thinks I've gone insane with this Jack Johnson kick, but I can't help it. It's laid back, generally positive, and it reminds me of being on vacation or on the beach. I can't think of a better distraction.
Shopping has also become a distraction. Shopping for clothes (dieting has made this a little more palatable), shopping for electronics, shopping for vacations, shopping for whatever. Feeling empty? Economy got you down? My advice to you is to buy more stuff. You'll be helping the economy and keeping soulless corporate stooges like me gainfully employed.
How are you responding to the stress and worries of our times? Any tips or strategies for coping? If so, please do share.
Monday, March 9, 2009
the poser
The gym is a great place to observe human behavior. There are the guys who stare at themselves in the mirror, whether it's the bathroom mirror or the mirrors by the weights (there's one guy in particular who seems to make about 10 trips per visit to the bathroom to admire his biceps). There are the women who talk on their cell phones or text while they're on the treadmill (annoying). There are the men who come with their wives but then only work out half the time that they're there. There are the women who come in only to tan, and then quickly leave. There are the hardcore guys who do all sorts of exotic moves with weights and mats and other gym-related paraphernalia. All are fascinating to watch, and for the most part, I have no problem with them.
There's one particular guy I've seen at the gym a couple times that really bothers me, however. We'll call him The Poser. The Poser comes in with his wife, and his wife only walks on the treadmill. The Poser, however, is all over the place, making use of at least 75% of the machines/equipment while he visits. The Poser's entire persona drives me crazy. He starts off his routine by doing all sorts of ridiculous stretches and moving his head around to get himself ready for a big workout. He then proceeds to walk 1 mph for five minutes on the treadmill. He follows this up by climbing about .1 mph on the stairmaster for another five minutes. Now that he's gotten all worked up, it's time to do some more stretches. He follows this up by lifting a few weights, after which he takes off his t-shirt to reveal a tight wife-beater. This is, of course, completely unnecessary since The Poser has barely done anything since he set foot in the gym, other than make a big deal out of his being there. In short, The Poser is a fake. A phony. An impostor. The Poser needs a beating, and I'd love to be the person to administer it.
There's one particular guy I've seen at the gym a couple times that really bothers me, however. We'll call him The Poser. The Poser comes in with his wife, and his wife only walks on the treadmill. The Poser, however, is all over the place, making use of at least 75% of the machines/equipment while he visits. The Poser's entire persona drives me crazy. He starts off his routine by doing all sorts of ridiculous stretches and moving his head around to get himself ready for a big workout. He then proceeds to walk 1 mph for five minutes on the treadmill. He follows this up by climbing about .1 mph on the stairmaster for another five minutes. Now that he's gotten all worked up, it's time to do some more stretches. He follows this up by lifting a few weights, after which he takes off his t-shirt to reveal a tight wife-beater. This is, of course, completely unnecessary since The Poser has barely done anything since he set foot in the gym, other than make a big deal out of his being there. In short, The Poser is a fake. A phony. An impostor. The Poser needs a beating, and I'd love to be the person to administer it.
Watchmen: DO NOT SEE THIS MOVIE
It sucked.
As I've mentioned previously, I've been going to the movies like crazy since I graduated in December. I'm running out of decent movies to watch, however, so I decided to take a chance on "Watchmen" on Friday afternoon. Other than the fact that it was based on a graphic novel (Why can't they just call it a comic book, for the love of Peter?) and that it had superheroes and a few big explosions, I didn't know much more about it than the fact that there was a lot of hype surrounding it.
I should have studied up a bit more. I wasn't prepared for the blood, the limbs being hacked off, the extreme violence, or the kind of weird sex scene where one superhero is shagging another in their floating hovervehicle thingy. I was also not prepared for all the going back and forth in time. I mean, seriously, if people want to do that, they should get a time machine rather than a videocamera. And then there was the length--almost three hours of this mess. After I got home from the movie, I read a review of it where the critic called it "interminable". Yes, that's an excellent way to put it.
I must admit that there were some cool explosions (I will overlook the flaws of most movies that contain nuclear explosions--that's the quickest way to my heart that I know of--but not this one) and some interesting special effects (save the crappy animation on the blue guy's mouth, where his words were out of sync with his mouth), but it just wasn't enough to save "Watchmen" from the dustbin of film history.
Save your money. Save yourselves. Do not see "Watchmen". It's a colossal failure.
As I've mentioned previously, I've been going to the movies like crazy since I graduated in December. I'm running out of decent movies to watch, however, so I decided to take a chance on "Watchmen" on Friday afternoon. Other than the fact that it was based on a graphic novel (Why can't they just call it a comic book, for the love of Peter?) and that it had superheroes and a few big explosions, I didn't know much more about it than the fact that there was a lot of hype surrounding it.
I should have studied up a bit more. I wasn't prepared for the blood, the limbs being hacked off, the extreme violence, or the kind of weird sex scene where one superhero is shagging another in their floating hovervehicle thingy. I was also not prepared for all the going back and forth in time. I mean, seriously, if people want to do that, they should get a time machine rather than a videocamera. And then there was the length--almost three hours of this mess. After I got home from the movie, I read a review of it where the critic called it "interminable". Yes, that's an excellent way to put it.
I must admit that there were some cool explosions (I will overlook the flaws of most movies that contain nuclear explosions--that's the quickest way to my heart that I know of--but not this one) and some interesting special effects (save the crappy animation on the blue guy's mouth, where his words were out of sync with his mouth), but it just wasn't enough to save "Watchmen" from the dustbin of film history.
Save your money. Save yourselves. Do not see "Watchmen". It's a colossal failure.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
a miracle for our time
We have an elliptical in our garage. After I ran on it last night, I put my iPod and headphones on the bottom of my car's windshield so that I would remember to put them back in my gym bag, which was in the car's trunk. And then I drove to work this morning...and to the mall...and back home again...and to dinner tonight...and all the while, my iPod and headphones were still on the windshield. I didn't realize this until the little lady saw them when we were getting back in the car after dinner. Miraculously, even with all the driving I did today, they never moved from the bottom of the windshield. I was relieved when I realized what had happened, since the iPod is less than a month old and since the headphones cost more than the iPod did.
In the future, I think I'll just put my stuff away when I'm done with it.
In the future, I think I'll just put my stuff away when I'm done with it.
Friday, March 6, 2009
10 years gone by
Yesterday marked 10 years from the day that three of the four people in this picture left Hong Kong, the odd man out being me. I actually had to extend a week or two, as that was the earliest my parents could come. It was worth it to see Beijing and Xi'an (I met them in Beijing) and to show them around Hong Kong, but my friends were none too happy with me for my "lack of devotion" to leaving the first possible day I could. Good times.
Few days go by where I don't think about my time in Hong Kong. I suppose it's fitting that I bought my plane ticket for my first trip back in nine years yesterday. Most of my time in Asia will be spent in Shenzhen, Xiamen and Taipei, but at least I'll be going back and seeing a few new cities, along with spending at least one night in one of my favorite places in the world.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
world traveler
I got my visa back from the Chinese embassy this morning, so I guess that makes it official: I'm going to China. I'm going to be super busy with travels this year. Here's what I have scheduled so far:
April 8-13: Mexico
April 15-29: China, Hong Kong and Taiwan
July 2-5: Los Angeles
July 23-31: Seattle, Alaska cruise
We're probably going to go to Utah for Christmas as well, and I'll go on to Los Angeles by myself the day after Christmas (I always do this when it's a Utah visit year). And I've already been to New York and New Jersey this year, too.
Considering my undying love for all things Chinese, I'm not looking forward to the China trip. It's for work, and the vast majority of my time will be spent in factories and meetings, and when I'm not doing those things, I'll be trying desperately to catch up on email. That means little or no time for friends, wandering around or whatever else I would typically do if I was free. The major upside to all of this, however, is the frequent flyer miles. I'll be flying business class the whole way, so I'm going to rack up some serious miles on this trip. Awesome.
It wouldn't surprise me if I went to China again in the fall. And there might be some more domestic travel, too. What a year it's going to be.
April 8-13: Mexico
April 15-29: China, Hong Kong and Taiwan
July 2-5: Los Angeles
July 23-31: Seattle, Alaska cruise
We're probably going to go to Utah for Christmas as well, and I'll go on to Los Angeles by myself the day after Christmas (I always do this when it's a Utah visit year). And I've already been to New York and New Jersey this year, too.
Considering my undying love for all things Chinese, I'm not looking forward to the China trip. It's for work, and the vast majority of my time will be spent in factories and meetings, and when I'm not doing those things, I'll be trying desperately to catch up on email. That means little or no time for friends, wandering around or whatever else I would typically do if I was free. The major upside to all of this, however, is the frequent flyer miles. I'll be flying business class the whole way, so I'm going to rack up some serious miles on this trip. Awesome.
It wouldn't surprise me if I went to China again in the fall. And there might be some more domestic travel, too. What a year it's going to be.
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