telephoto funtime

My dad just bought a Canon 5D, so I've been showing him the ropes and such. Earlier this afternoon, I suggested that he try out my fisheye lens, since the 5D's full frame sensor wouldn't cut off any of the curvature effect. He ended up liking it quite a bit, so he walked around the house and yard taking pictures of different things. The weather is crappy (figures it would rain while I'm in LA) and I had nothing else to do, so I put my 100-400mm telephoto lens on my camera and headed outside as well. I just took photos of random things, but had fun.

Banana plant (I think). From 100mm:


Christmas lights. From 400mm:


The spoiler on my dad's car. From 100mm:


Wrought iron gate. From 400mm:


Christmas ornament. From 310mm:


Flower. From 310mm:


Flower. From 320mm:


I took all of these without a tripod. The more I use this lens, the more impressed with it I am. If you have the means, I highly recommend picking one up.

I'll have to see if I can get some of my dad's fisheye photos. They're pretty entertaining.

father/son bonding time

I was sitting at the kitchen counter at my parents' house last night when my dad asked if I minded if he put on "The Day the World Ended" (or something like that), a 50's movie about people who have survived a nuclear holocaust, on the TV. Since I was using my computer and rarely pay attention to TV anyway, I told him I didn't really care one way or the other.

After a while, I brought my computer over and sat in the chair next to him. The movie was fairly cheesy--bad acting, ridiculous costumes and makeup (why all the women looked like they were about to go to cocktail parties is completely beyond me), etc. As such, I only half-paid attention and kept surfing the net.

All of sudden, I heard a strange sound come from the TV.

me: Was that a fart I just heard?

Dad: I'm not sure.

me: Do you have a DVR? Can we rewind this?

Dad: Yeah (fumbles with the remote, rewinds back about a minute).

By now, I was on the edge of my seat with anticipation. I knew I heard that fart. Sure enough, there was a major blast in the movie. A serious movie, not a comedy, from the 50's. A couple of guys, one old and one middle-aged, are sitting in a shelter when another guy walks in and announces something. Old guy lays down a huge fart, gets up and shouts something incomprehensible, then runs out of the shelter as the other guy sitting down shakes his head. It made no sense and was totally out of place given the context. We were both dying laughing, so my dad rewound it again...and again...and again...and again. We both had tears in our eyes by the third or fourth time, we were laughing so hard.

My dad looked up the movie on IMDB, and found that the movie had been filmed in nine days. Nine days! Who makes a film in nine days? Sounds like a low-budget flick if there ever was one. It certainly seemed like the sound editing budget had been cut.

We may not agree on everything, but I'm glad that my dad and I both agree that a well-placed fart in an unexpected place is pure comedic gold.

Now, listen closely toward the beginning of this clip, and enjoy a magical movie moment.

an early christmas present

While being left-handed has certainly enhanced my standing as a superior human being, it has also meant that I've had to deal with life in a right-handed world. Products that are appropriate for the blessed few on the left are often difficult to come by, from scissors to computer mice. It's not that they don't exist; it's just that they're either few and far between, or widely available but yet are of sub-standard quality.

One particular area of difficulty is guitars. Sure, any guitar is available to you, as long as you're willing to pay extra. For years I've dreamed of owning a few different guitar models, and have sprung at the chance to buy one when a decent lefty model has become available. This just happened to happen a few days before Christmas. I saw one of my dream guitars on eBay and jumped at the chance to own it. Here she is:



It's a PRS Custom 22 10 Top. PRS quit making standard production lefty guitars a few years ago, so existing models are now collector's items and pretty difficult to come by. I saw this one and got particularly excited about it because not only was in a Custom, as I had been wanting, but it was also in the exact color that I've always wanted--emerald green. PRS has also stopped making guitars in this color altogether, so I feel pretty lucky. It cost me an arm and a leg, but I love this guitar and am thrilled to have it.

Only one more guitar left on my dream guitar list: a Jackson King V. I've never seen a lefty before.

christmas eve alone

Greetings from Utah and Merry Christmas to you (if that's your December holiday of choice).

The little lady decided to cook a Thanksgiving-style dinner for her family for Christmas Eve, which left me with no plans and no one to hang out with for the day. Being thus abandoned, I decided to get in my fabulous rental car and search for photo opportunities.

My original plan was to stop by my alma mater, BYU, but the plan quickly changed when I got outside and found visibility to be horrible due to a snowstorm. So, after driving around the campus for a couple minutes, I headed further north.

A friend once marveled at how my inability to sleep resulted in me having 30% more consciousness than her on any given day. I think all that consciousness is having a negative effect on my ability to remember things, because I couldn't remember how to get where I was going. I drove aimlessly around campus, and then thinking I go could up into Provo Canyon from there, I drove by the LDS Missionary Training Center and Provo Temple, but that turned out to be the wrong direction. I almost made another wrong turn up a road, but changed my mind at the last minute. It turned out that if I had just chosen the simplest route to begin with, I would have gotten where I needed to go.

The snow stopped when I got a few miles up the canyon, and the sky was mostly clear from there forward. My first stop was Bridal Veil Falls, a waterfall I used to like to visit when I was in college. I had dressed pretty warmly and had also brought a beanie/neck cover combo Becca bought me a few years ago, which turned out to be a good idea, as the temperature had also dropped 13 degrees in the few miles up the canyon I had traveled.

The beginning of the trail to the waterfall:


Except for a few joggers (!) coming off the trail, the trail and falls were completely deserted. This made for a nice, quiet walk and lots of opportunities for cool photos.



Neither the river nor the falls had frozen over, which was a bit unusual considering the daytime temperature in the low teens.





It was under similar conditions that I proposed to Becca at this very spot in December 2000. It was cloudy and cold, and there was lots of snow. It wasn't cloudy yesterday, but there was lots of snow. In the places I walked that hadn't already been packed down by hikers and skiers, the snow went almost up to my knee.



It was good to go back, and I'm glad there was nobody there. There's nothing like having beautiful scenery all to yourself.



I continued up the canyon and made it out to the other side, where Heber City is located. I've always enjoyed this drive, and yesterday was no exception. There was lots of great scenery, but due to the snow on the side of the road and/or lack of places to stop, I wasn't able to photograph much of it. I was, however, able to get some nice photos of the reservoir on the Heber City side of the canyon.







I drove closer to Heber City and then turned off on a road that skirted the edge of the reservoir. I found a place where the water's edge was close to the road and pulled over, but this turned out to be a bad idea. The snow was so deep that my trusty rental got stuck, and no amount of going back and forth in forward and reverse would get her unstuck. Fortunately, I was only stuck for a few minutes before a big pickup truck pulled over, and a father and son got out and offered to help. After a few minutes of pushing plus some rocking back and forth, we finally got the car out of the snow. I decided it was probably best to not try that again, so I didn't get the shots I was looking for on that side of the reservoir. Bummer.

I made my way back to the Provo side of the canyon and stopped at Riverwoods. I decided to see a movie there and had time to kill, so I read a trashy metal magazine at Borders, then went and had lunch at a Mexican place called Bajio. It was like Chipotle and Qdoba, but not as good, so I won't be going back. The movie I watched was "Up In The Air", the new George Clooney flick. There were only three other people in the theater, so I had my choice of seats and was able to enjoy the movie without distractions of any kind. It was a very good movie, and my connection with it was enhanced by the fact that, like the protagonist, I, too, am a corporate whore that travels a fair amount each year. If an R rating doesn't bother you, check it out--it's one of the best movies I've seen this year.

Of all days, Christmas Eve is an odd one to spend alone, but I'm glad I did. It gave me time to re-acquaint myself with a place I used to live but which, for whatever reason, I just don't remember that well any more.

the elemental states of food

As I was finishing off the last of the Thomas English muffins on our counter, I was thinking about how amazing the English muffin is. They're totally disgusting before they're toasted, and then they miraculously transform into one of the most amazing baked goods ever concocted. Perhaps it's all in my head, but there are many foods that are like this for me. In one state, the food is completely unfit for human consumption; in another, it becomes live-giving elixir fit only for deities. For example:

Raw tomatoes: Vile. Reprehensible.
Pasta sauce: Unbelievable. Lusted after.
Salsa: The war in Iraq is being fought over something less important. A dearth of salsa would send this nation into chaos.

Raw mangoes: Awful.
Mango juice: Not bad.
Mango juice mixed with some other form of juice: I'll have another, please.

Raw zucchini: I can't imagine how anyone ever decided this was edible.
Steamed zucchini: Somehow even worse than raw zucchini.
Stir-fried zucchini: Wow.
Grilled zucchini: Now you're talkin'!

Raw cranberries: The acrid bile that wells up in my throat when I pull into the office parking lot at the beginning of each day is less bitter.
Cranberry sauce: Meh.
Cranberry juice: Getting warmer.
Cranberry juice mixed with some other juice: I've considered injecting it directly into my veins for a faster hit. White cranberry/peach and cranberry/grape blends are some of the most addictive beverages known to man.

Raw pork: I'd rather be put in front of a firing squad.
Pork rinds: Strangely enough, I loved these things when I was younger. What was I thinking?
Roast pork (like Polynesians do): What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger, unless, of course, it severely weakens you in the process of trying to kill you.
Pork chops: Hot diggity.
Ham: Hallowed when done right, loathsome when done wrong. If you find a winner, stick with it.
Bacon: Blessed be the most holy name of bacon.

Avatar 3D

I haven't been following all the "Avatar" hype, but after seeing many of my friends' rave reviews of it, I took the little lady to see the 3D version yesterday morning.



This was our first experience seeing a regular, non-documentary film in 3D. And really, if you're considering seeing this movie, then it's probably worth the few extra bucks (and the trouble, if there's no 3D-equipped theater near you) to see it in 3D.

Why, you ask? It's simple: "Avatar" is more about the visuals than it is about the story. The story has been done before--in books, in film, in real life. If you've seen "Dances With Wolves", you're familiar with the story line. The white man comes and takes from an oppressed group of people. Oppressed group of people fights back, usually with mixed results. Anyway, back to my point about the visuals. In short, they're stunning. There is no question in my mind that "Avatar" will be regarded for years to come as one of the most groundbreaking movies ever. No one has ever mixed real characters with CGI like James Cameron has here. And, to the best of my knowledge, no one has ever created an entire alien world like Cameron has here, either. If you care about cinematography, special effects and/or science fiction even a little bit, prepare to have your mind blown.

I wish the story had been better. Over $200 million is a lot to spend to make a movie with a storyline that has been done many times before, especially if you're going to do it without developing many of the key characters. This was my biggest issue with the film.

I'd rate "Avatar" a solid "B". It's well worth your time, but it's definitely not movie of the year material.

new facebook friend

Facebook suggested that I add this person as my friend based on the fact that we went to the same high school:



No, I didn't know her, but my sister did. Maybe I could leverage that connection?

linguistic pet peeves

1. Its vs. it's. It seems like 1% of the population actually gets this right. Here's the correct way to handle these two words:

It's = it is. For example, "It's not my job" = "It is not my job".
Its = possessive form of it. For example, "Each guitar has its own special tone and characteristics."

2. Hypercorrection of "xxx and I". For example, many people say things like this, thinking they'll sound more intelligent:

"Send an email to John and I, and we'll look into it."

This is grammatically incorrect. Take away the "John and" above, then say the sentence. Understand now why it's incorrect? "I" is not an object, so don't use it like one.

3. "Chipotle" is not pronounced "Chih-POL-tay". Duh.

4. Chinglish. Since I get this almost every day, it's gone from being funny to being irritating. For example, I work with a guy nicknamed bunnie (yes, lowercase, and yes, weird). Every time I hear his name from my Chinese colleagues, I hear "Bernie", despite having corrected this multiple times.

More Chinglish irritations:

Ever - The Chinese love to do direct translations of the Chinese word that they think directly translates to "ever", but unfortunately, there isn't one. It thus ends up being used like this:

"I have ever been to the U.S."

WRONG

Kindly - There's some English textbook that the entire People's Republic of China must be using, because they love to use this word in ways that I've never seen a native speaker use it. For example:

"Steve, please kindly review and provide your comments."

NO

Well - Another incorrect direct translation from Chinese. For example:

"Well noted on your comments, Steve."

Copycat writing - I've noticed that things I write are often quickly copied by my Chinese colleagues. I suppose I should be flattered that I have disciples running around Shanghai, but I wish they understood well enough to come up with their own creative writing styles, minus "well", "ever", etc.

5. Business-speak in all its ugly forms. Here's a list of meaningless corporate babble that I hear on a regular basis:

synergy
low-hanging fruit
burning platform
laser-focused
holistic (often misspelled as "wholistic" - lame)
ping

Don't understand some of these? Consider yourself lucky.

Business-related words that have become annoying because they're so overused:

touchbase
aligned
headwinds
learnings (not even a real word unless you're a corporate stooge, like me)

If you're going to use one of these words, at least preface it with an apology for being a douche.

6. You know - here's a little self-hate. I probably say "you know" at least once a minute, and I've been trying not to say it so much. No one wants to hear filler ("like", "whatever", etc.), least of all me.

my favorite christmas albums

I just checked and I have 45 albums worth of Christmas music. Yes, that's probably excessive, but then, so is the rest of my music collection. I certainly don't listen to them all on a regular basis, but I will listen to them when I feel the need for some Christmas cheer. It could be July and 100 degrees, but that doesn't matter to me. Good music is good music, right?

45 albums gives me a lot of variety. Here are some of my faves, in no particular order:



Kenny Burrell - Have Yourself a Soulful Little Christmas

Kenny Burrell is probably my favorite jazz guitarist of all time, and this gem from the mid-60's is a good example of why. No lyrics on this one--just some great guitar and a big band in the background.



Frank Sinatra - The Sinatra Christmas Album

There's something very nostalgic about this one for me, but I can't quite put my finger on why. It's not like my parents had this or played it when I was growing up. It's nice to hear Sinatra in this context, as it's a stark contrast to the hard-nosed persona that he had outside of his music.



Tony Bennett - Snowfall: The Tony Bennett Christmas Album

More nostalgia, and without good reason. I've been familiar with this album less than 10 years, and it's quickly moved to the top 2-3 of my favorite Christmas albums. It just wouldn't be Christmas without Tony Bennett.



Stephanie Osborne - Victorian Christmas

I learned about this one on one of my music bulletin boards, and I'm glad I did. It's a very laid back, dreamy set of Christmas songs on solo harp. Great for a quiet afternoon in front of a Christmas tree.



Tchaikovsky - The Nutcracker

No introduction necessary here. This version, conducted by Antal Dorati, is my favorite performance and it has excellent sound quality, too.



Anonymous 4 - Wolcum Yule

I don't know who these people are (certainly the name doesn't tell you much), but this is a great album that I found on sale on some random website a few years ago. It's a set of traditional English and Celtic Christmas carols, and it has a quiet, baroque vibe to it. Another great one for a lazy holiday afternoon.



Vince Guaraldi - A Charlie Brown Christmas

Hands down, this is my favorite Christmas album of all time. I listen to it year round, every year. The day I first found this on CD was one of the happiest days of my life. Each listen is a step back into my childhood and simpler, happier times. I watched the TV show multiple times every year, and still watch it at least once a year even now. I have 3-4 different masterings of the album, and it never gets old. Oh, and by the way: Vince Guaraldi's other albums are well worth checking out. He wasn't the greatest or most famous jazz pianist ever, but he tended to play upbeat, engaging tunes. Maybe "sunny" is how I would best describe his style. That he lived on the West Coast shines through on every album.

Got a favorite Christmas album that I haven't mentioned here? Let me know.

a star filter and the family christmas tree

The little lady decorated our Christmas tree tonight (man, do I love Christmas trees), so I thought it would be a good time to try out a star filter I borrowed from the office. Very cool effect, if a tad cheesy at times.

Click on the photos to enlarge them. Enjoy.






I also went outside to play with the star filter a little more (a tad foolish when it's 18F and you're wearing shorts and have no gloves, but whatever). If I were to buy one, I think I'd buy a 4-point or 6-point. The one I'm using is an 8-point and the stars get out of hand when there are lots of lights. Click to enlarge so you can see what I mean.

scenes from thanksgiving

I've been lazy on the blogging front recently, so here are some pictures for you. My parents came to town for Thanksgiving and we celebrated at my brother's home (he's in Rochester, a couple hours away from us). We had a great meal and a great time overall.

This is the first year that we haven't hit early morning Black Friday sales, but that's OK. Despite my profession, sometimes all the consumerism of the holidays can really get me down. Anyway, without further ado...